Work Out Your Own Salvation!!!
I thought to write and tell you of the goodness of the LORD. The benefits of worshipping Him with awe-inspired reverence. This is difficult for me because I am in a place where the Holy Spirit is so intimate with me that it is becoming almost impossible to verbalize His majestic glory.
I am in the book of Psalms and have skipped over Job for now. Because of its intricacy and the many wounds that have been dealt at the hands of “friends and family”, the LORD told me that I am not mentally or spiritually ready to take on Job. As of yet.
Even now I must revisit this because I consider myself articulate. But not when it comes to describing the fullness of the LORD in all His omniscience.
I am at a loss for words and if you read my blogs, it may seem as if I am attempting to deceive you. I assure you that I am not. I crave the love and acceptance of One and if no one ever reads this I know that I am true to the love and desire that I have for Him.
What True Love and Zeal Encompasses
It is so very easy to obsess over a man, woman or thing. Putting them above all. Setting them up as idols in our lives. Having done this many times, it is not something I will go back to. I refuse to allow anyone or anything to undermine my affinity for the LORD.
Our bond is insurmountable. I truly understand Psalm 42: 1-2, “As the deer pants [longingly] for water brooks, So my soul pants [longingly] for You, O God. My soul (my life, my inner self) thirsts for God, for the living God. (AMP).
But beware. The devil is crafty. He will set someone before your eyes that is broken. Who has created a facade of being well put together. Hiding behind money and titles. But this is where God’s grace and discernment are pure. I may have been fooled by that in the past, but the Spirit spoke to me, and I listened. “This individual is so toxic that his goal is to rob you of your esteem by belittling you to make you feel less than. So that you willingly submit to evil. To his will”.
No. I worked too hard with my Heavenly Therapist to get to this space, not to just stay here. But to evolve. As I communed with the Spirit, I understood that it was futile to waste my time. To have sympathy, to try and understand. To attempt to convince him that he could become whole and healed. That I could “save” him.
No. Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. As the young women are saying today, “That’s above my pay grade. I can’t do it”!
Test The Spirits
Because simultaneously, I am exposed to someone who goes out of his way to speak to me regardless of his title, and those surrounding him. Who does not feel the need to make sure that I “know my place”. Not desiring to be flattered, while showing his affluence to attempt to impress others.
What God showed me about the first individual was that he was deeply scarred. His wounds are so traumatic that he remains a little boy, disguised as a man.
What I am ultimately seeing is that this affects men and women alike. But I will save that lesson for another day. (This trauma transcends the color line. I see it clearly and it is sad. Particularly, when the individual ignores it while exuding mental instability. It is problematic!!!
When you see someone like this. No matter how “well put together” they may seem. Run!!! If it is impossible because you work on a job with them then create boundaries and distance.
I noticed the other day that people at my places of employment are always looking at me as if I think I am too good because I never feel the need to be a part of the crowd. I don’t need their acceptance. And where the devil tried to make me feel guilty, my spirit said, “No, No, and nope”. I cherish my peace and like Pastor Blake’s said as he was confirming what the Spirit was pouring into me in this situation, “No man can give you peace, but he can certainly take away your peace”.
I Will Choose Life
As someone who was in a situation-ship/marriage for years. And every other relationship that the devil sent my way to demean and destroy me, I now choose to see and hear clearly when the Spirit is discerning. Because the confident anointing in my life is so attractive to others. But this is a two-edged sword. Attracting good and evil. So, No. Like RC Blake’s, Jr. and the elders used to say, “You are not just gone walk all up in and through my life Willy-Nilly”.
I’ve come too far in the LORD. And I have a saying that I haven’t used in a while, but it is very relevant in my life now. “I see you coming for me before you even think to do so”. To make it clear. I know who the devil sends just like it is evident when you are sent by God.
Again, I digress. My focus was on trying to eloquently express God’s goodness. But if you pay attention, it is on full display. It was the Spirit showing me how to ascertain between someone that is healthy and a pretender. If I had 10,000 tongues, it wouldn’t be enough to say, LORD, I thank You!
I love me some me. And because of this. I’m gone wipe the dust off my feet, when it’s toxic, and keep it moving.
Always coming from a place of love!!!
Originally written on September 06, 2022.